Why Is Postpartum Anxiety Worse At Night (& What You Can Do About It)?

Postpartum anxiety is very real. About 6% of pregnant women and 10% of postpartum women experience anxiety. And moms aren’t the only ones, dads do too. But why is postpartum anxiety worse at night? And what can you do about it?

Recommended reading: What Is Postpartum Anxiety? And Can It Be Prevented?

If your baby hasn’t started sleeping through the night, then you may be thinking, “when will my baby go to sleep, or how long will my baby sleep before I am woken up again.” This can keep you in a hyperaroused state and make it difficult to quiet your mind so you can fall asleep.

But let’s say that your baby is sleeping from at least midnight until 5 or 6 am. Your house is now quiet. The day is no longer available to distract you from what is making you anxious.

The fact that the house is quiet at night is really simplifying why postpartum anxiety is worse at night. And in reality, you may struggle to distract yourself from the thoughts that come along with postpartum anxiety during the daylight hours.

That is because postpartum anxiety is different from anxiety not related to childbirth.

First, postpartum anxiety is one of the most common presentations of a postpartum mood disorder, specifically, postpartum depression. And postpartum depression is an agitated depression and can make falling asleep or staying asleep difficult.

Also, postpartum panic response can cause moms to wake up unexpectedly in the middle of the night.

Interested in learning more about postpartum anxiety, click here.

So what can you do about it?

• Make sure you are staying hydrated and getting enough nutrition.
  This may seem either silly or obvious but a day with a baby can get away from you real quick. Before you know it, all you have had is maybe one glass of water and a granola bar.
  
  Getting enough food and water throughout the day has a positive impact on your mental health and can make it easier for you to keep your fight-or-flight response at bay.

• Practice the breathing technique called The Relaxation Response.
  When you are feeling anxious, you stop breathing properly which actually increases the physical symptoms of anxiety.
  
  Practicing this breathing technique at least once a day can positively impact how you feel all day, which will make it easier for your body and mind to slow down so you can fall asleep.
  
  
• Understand what anxiety really is.
  Anxiety is all about the future and usually asks the question, “what if.” What if ___________ happens to my baby or me? These thoughts are scary but remember, you aren’t in the future, you are in the here and now.
  
  Jumping on the anxiety train of thought deceives you into thinking that if you can plan for “what if”, then you can control it.
  
  But 99% of the time, that “what if” scenario never happens. It surely doesn’t prepare you for anything. It only makes you miserable in the present moment.
  

• Use a grounding technique.
  A grounding technique is something that mindfully brings your attention to the present.
  
  One good grounding technique is to use your 5 senses to bring you back into the present moment. Ask yourself, what do you taste, hear, smell, feel, and see. Describe out loud the answer to each of the senses.
  
  This can help you notice that you and your baby are safe. You can even find things around you to smell, taste, etc that make you feel good, like ice cream, or the smell of your baby, or how soft your baby feels next to your skin.
  
  
• Don’t keep your thoughts to yourself.
  I know it might be scary sharing your thoughts and internal experience with someone for fear of judgment or misunderstanding, but keeping it to yourself will only make you feel worse.
  
  Saying out loud what you are scared of diminishes its power. Therefore minimizing the intensity of your anxiety.
  
  Talk to your partner. Remember you both are in this parenting thing together. Chances are your partner is experiencing some anxiety as well.
  
  If you aren’t ready to share with your partner, then maybe a trusted friend, or a family member.
  
  If you don’t yet feel emotionally safe with your partner, a friend, or family member, then find a therapist who specializes in perinatal mood and anxiety experiences. Feeling emotionally safe is critical to navigating postpartum anxiety.
  

These suggestions are just your starting point. One may seem more reasonable for you to start than the other. And after you start it, you may find you don’t like it.

Everyone is different in what works best for them. And the intensity of postpartum anxiety can be mild, moderate, or severe. If these suggestions don’t work for you, don’t be afraid to ask for help.

You don’t have to suffer and you don’t have to go through this alone.

Anxiety happens when you think you have to figure out everything all at once. Breathe. You’re strong. You got this. Take it day by day.

Karen Salmansohn

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Jacqueline V. Cohen is a Licensed Professional Counselor, an ADHD Certified Clinical Specialist Provider, and a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist who works with courageous women and mothers that want to live authentically. You can connect with her by email or to learn more about her practice and specialties, visit her website.